The Legend of Myrin Series- by DxnkMemeZ

[JohnKrasinskii]

Hello, over the last few years of me playing minecraft I have created a book series called... "The Legend of Myrin" often recognized as LoM. I have written over 61 chapters and have put chapter 1 for a possible publish in the book store. I have had some very nice ratings so far of the book and hope for others to enjoy it.

If you are interested in getting the book in game, /mail send DxnkMemeZ. If you wish to see the whole file on my docs, which has 61 chapters, it can be found here:

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B-_fOTxN_F37Q1NpTFliVzNMblU

You can also install them there / put them under your docs. Enjoy!

I hope you all love the story. I have put a lot of work into it and have shared it through many servers. Lets see if it gets shared well here as well.

Thanks
-DxnkMemeZ

 

[JohnKrasinskii]

I would like to quote the last page of chapter 1 (which has 3 pages).

"I kick the guards in the face, grab the hoe, and hit them over their heads. They fall to the ground, unconcious. I then run away, running as far as I can."

1. How did he manage to kick 2 trained, and armed, guards IN THE FACE almost instantly, and without effort?

2. How did he then grab the hoe AND hit BOTH the guards with it, BEFORE they even started to fall?

3. Where are the other two people when their ONLY guards are knocked out by who I assume is a child hunter?

4. You previously said the guards were wearing masks. Where were those masks when the guards were kicked in the face by a child?

4 problems with one small paragraph in the first chapter, ignoring the shitty writing. ("I then ran away, running as far as I can." You switched tenses at the end of that sentence. You dont say "I ean away as fast as I can", you day "I ran away as fast as I COULD.")

You say "61 chapters", but if chapter 1 was any indicator of the length of the other chapters, as it was only 3 pages, it would not amount to half of that if actually made into a decent book.

It might work as a kids book, as they pay little no attention to detail up to a certain age, but not as a real book.

As I told you, many days ago (I hope you can remember) I've been writing this for years. This was about 4 years ago. (Chapter one)